Soooo, since moving to Northeastern Montana I have found that there is a whole new culture here. Don't get me wrong, I love it! But there are lots of things that I have learned. When I recently traveled to California to visit family, a lot of my conversations revolved around cows, the farm, and people asking me, "so what DO you do up there?" My first response was usually, "yes, we have running water and electricity. And no, we don't ride horses to school and work." Up here, it's just a way of life, but to people not from here, it's a completely different world. Not being from here and moving here, I have seen both sides. A lot of times I still scratch my head at stuff that people do or say, and just go with it.
One of the first things that I learned after moving here, was that I am related to just about everyone. It's no wonder Patrick had to marry someone that wasn't from here! When I get introduced to people, they say, "Ohhh, Hackley! I know (Rick, Tom, Steve, Patty, Bill, Patrick, etc). They don't associate you as an individual, but rather who you "belong" to. Literally, I have had people say, "Hey Pat Hackley's wife!" It's as if I don't have a name. Half of the time when I introduce myself to people, I actually say, "I'm Nicole, Pat Hackley's wife." They immediately understand. To me, that's weird. To them, that's how it is.
I was at a meeting the other day with a colleague. When she introduced me, she practically gave my life story as to how I ended up here. I thought it was strange, but just went with it. Afterward she asked if I noticed how she introduced me to the group. I told her I did and that I thought it was slightly over the top! She asked, "Well did you notice how none of them asked any questions after your introduction?" When I thought about this, she was right. This was the first time that I had been given a full introduction where no one asked who I "belonged" to. I guess that's just how they do it here...
Signing off..."Pat Hackley's wife"
I am so glad that you have a blog now! I would love to be able to read your daily thoughts about life in Eastern MT. It's so different than my day to day that I enjoy a different perspective on what a life is like on the other side of the country! Xoxo
ReplyDeleteHi Nicole! I have issues with this "who do you belong to" thing. I think you are an individual that stands out for her own merit. But I get it. I really do get it. Your whole point is that it's different. Your associations are a benefit. You fit in with your community by way of who belong with. To me the really important questions is this: Do your peers recognize that you carry a fabulous handbag? Love you!
ReplyDeleteYeah, it's a hard thing to deal with. It mostly comes from when I first am introduced to people in the community, but after I have a relationship established with them they know I am my own person! Being associated with a good family is a great thing though! And here, it does give you a leg to stand on at first. And yes, my peers know I have SEVERAL fabulous handbags!!! I get compliments all the time on them!
ReplyDeleteThis is so cute! Your very first post! :o) I'm so glad you linked back to it today. You must live in a very close knit community. Those are the only types I've seen where familial associations are how someone gets to know you. :o) That's how it works in the Deaf community, too. When I attend Deaf functions, the first thing they ask you after your name and whether you are hearing or deaf, is who you are related to. :o)
ReplyDelete