Someone Gimme a Bottle of Wine!

I need it after last night. So, you remember how I gave you my funny little story about the horses yesterday? Yeah it was cute and all at first. But looking back, it's not cute AT ALL. It didn't end there. I thought it did, but was informed otherwise on my way home from work yesterday. Hubs and I had a nice evening planned...going to finish packing for our Vegas trip, have take out at the diner in our little town, then go watch our cousin play in a basketball game.

Boy howdy, was I ever wrong. My nice little evening turned into a shitstorm. Hubs called on the way home and said that our neighbor's horses got out AGAIN. So logical me thought out loud, "Well why doesn't she just put a gate up over her driveway so they can't get out?" Hubs then proceeds to hell me that she doesn't want to do that. "She wants" (meaning that she wants US to do everything for her while she watches) to bring her horses over to our farmyard, a half mile away. Problem: both ours and her horse trailers are stuck in about 8 foot snow drifts. So we apparently are going to try and walk these horses a half a mile in -15 degree weather, IN THE DARK, across a highway with traffic, into our farmyard. Ummm, by the way her horses aren't very trained and act very wildly. They're not the nice calm kind. Hubs then tells me our plans are now nonexistent because we'll be helping her out. OH HAPPY F**KING DAY.

So, I'm pissed. I am mad all the way home, and as I pull up to the farmyard, I get even MORE mad. Why? Because there on the side of the road, in 2 feet of snow in the ditch, is our neighbor's truck. She drove it off the road. It just happened and she was already walking down the driveway. I said, "Uh-oh! That doesn't look very good!" She says, "Well, you know it was hard to tell where the driveway was, because of all the blowing snow!" Ummm, first of all there was no blowing snow. The air was still and there wasn't even a slight breeze. Second of all, there are two GIANT REFLECTIVE yellow posts on each side of the driveway. Drive between them. It's not hard! I think she had the aid of some "medicine" in the liquid form. It's a good think I'm medicated or I would have flew off the handle!

So, she hops in and I drive her over near our farm shop. My father in law is already on the tractor plowing out one of the giant metal feeders so he can put hay in it for the horses. He also has to plow part of the pasture they're going into, so they can actually open the gate to get in. At this point, hubs is flying around on the snowmobile like a madman, rounding up a bucket of grain to try and lead the ponies, flashing lights for the tops of our vehicles to act as a warning person on the highway.

We get all that done and we send Hubs, FIL, and drinks-a-lot over to get the horses. The plan? My father in law was going to try and lead the horses with the bucket of grain as he walked the half mile in the snow to the farmyard. Neighbor was going to lead them down the the county dirt road, the head North on the highway to slow coming traffic. Hubs was going to bring up the rear to make sure they all made it ok. Following my very explicit directions to go South on the highway, pull over on the shoulder, then wait until I saw the light coming down the county road, I did just that.

And waited, and waited. Waited some more. Half an hour goes by and I got nothin! What the heck are they doing over there? But wait! I see the lights! They're coming down the hill! This crazy lunatic plan is actually working! I see the truck in front get to the highway and....starts coming my direction? This was not the plan. It was Hubs. Turns out the horses weren't buying it and didn't follow the grain. Operation Equine Transfer was a bust!

So what did we do? Left the horses in the pasture where they were, and put up a gate over the neighbor's driveway. Ummmm, isn't that what I said to do in the first place? Needless to say, we were both kinda cranky when we got home. I'm still a little bitter over it, in fact.

Anyways, we're headed out of this God-forsaken place the rest of this week and weekend to head to VEGAAAAAAAASSS! We own a timeshare there and are going to celebrate one of my sisters' 21st birthday! WOOP WOOP! So you all won 't be hearing from me until next Monday, but I'll have some GREAT stories for you!!!!